Sunday, March 8, 2009

Explaining a blue penis to your children

I went to see Watchmen yesterday to see if the movie was going to be a big let down. It wasn't. However, don't be like that jerk who went to watch the movie only to complain that it was the worse three hours of his life: It is not a superhero movie in the sense of Spider-man, Batman or Superman are a superhero movie.

Anyway, there I am sitting next to my mother who accompanied me to the film because we do that sometimes when Dr. Manhattan comes out in all his glory. And believe me when I say this, he's naked throughout most of the film and the camera doesn't shy away from his dong. This isn't anything new for me. I've seen worse movies with my mother - Y Tu Mama Tambien comes to mind, as well as a few other movie. However, what made me smirk was the fact the family sitting in front of us contained children ranging from the ages of 9-11 years old (two boys and one girl). How do you even explain that to them? I don't really find it all that offensive if boys see a penis on screen because they have one, but the girl?

Okay, parents, calm down! There's a simple way to avoid all this: DON'T TAKE YOUR CHILDREN TO A RATED R FILM. If you happen to let that slip, then you better be prepared to explain to little Jimmy or Stacey why the man's penis is blue and why it just hangs there. You may also want to prepare yourself for when they ask, "Does the penis get bigger when he gets bigger?" You only have yourself to blame.

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